Greedy Mother Fudge

Sasha and Kasha, sitting in a tree, H-I-S-S-I-N-G.
Getting back into the swing of things here in Amurkah is proving to be slightly difficult, as it turns out that my grandiose plans of doing homework while travelling fell through.  Let’s just say I didn’t get anything as much done as I had wished.  
Whatevs.  School can wait; I’ve got other things on the brain, such as:
This bag.  Zomg.  Gimme gimme gimme. (Pleaseandthankyou)
Pumpkinmania.  Seriously, it’s that time of year where every food blogger has to post seventeen thousand recipes for pumpkin.  I swear, pumpkin has exploded all over the web; I’m surprised Google’s logo isn’t covered in pumpkin guts by now.  You’d think they would pick up on these nuanced web trends.  I don’t hate it.  I rather like it.  I love me some punkin.  I, for one, bought nine cans on September 1st.  
Thanksgiving.  Ummmm I am either a typical American consumer, who expects, nay, awaits in anticipation, drooling and dreaming of hoarding, a barrage of Thanksgiving menus, recipes, ingredients, and decorations in August, or just a food freak.  Or both.  All I know is that I already planned my family’s entire Thanksgiving menu.  A week ago.  Lawd have mercy.
NOPI.  We went to NOPI for a pre-theatre meal while in London; the food and atmosphere were incredible.  I think I ate an entire loaf of their bread, not to mention the fact that three of us ordered 11 selections off the menu.  Yotam Ottolenghi’s newest cookbook, Jerusalem, has also recently come out.  He’s the man.
I’m also kept super busy with stalking the Fashion Week coverage over at the NYT.  (Maybe if I close my eyes real tight and click my heels three times…)
For the first time ever, I wish I spoke Japanese.  Sucks to suck.
I want a donut pan.
I also want a Birkin bag, and Tory Burch boots.
I want a tempurpedic mattress.
I want Martha Stewart’s house in Maine.
Oh, and the entire Rachel Roy spring 2013 collection.
On a side note, I am now accepting applications for the position of sugardaddy.  Applicants can send any or all of the above, along with a head shot, bank statement, video of yourself singing a capella, and some Valrhona chocolate, for good measure.  Please feel free to include diamonds from Tiffany’s and/or Cartier.  
In return for your life long service and tender love and care, I will bake you one (1) confection per week, if I’m feeling generous.  
Marvelous.  I’m sure I’ll be flooded with eager grooms-to-be very shortly.  
Someone send help.
(thanks to bakerella for the recipe, which she got from the book)
Made with both melted dark chocolate and cocoa powder, this chocolate cake is rich, complex, and bittersweet—a perfect match for sweet frostings, which is how you’ll find it paired in our Tomboy Cake, Bittersweet Ganache Cake, and Old-Fashioned Cake. As with the other base cakes, this recipe yields two 6-inch cakes, so you can have one on hand in your freezer to decorate anytime. This cake is infallibly moist. Part of the reason for its fine-crumb texture is that we strain the batter through a sieve to remove any lumps before pouring it into the pans. Straining out the lumps rather than trying to stir them into the batter prevents overmixing and leads to a dense cake. We also sift the cocoa before dusting the pans, a technique that will give the exterior finish of your cakes a lovely smooth patina. For the Old-Fashioned Cake, we bake this cake in a contour pan, a special design with a beveled edge around the bottom that yields an elegant cake with an almost seamless form. Contour pans come in standard sizes, including 6-inch, and are easily found online.
1. Liberally butter two 6-by-3-inch regular or contour cake pans and dust with sifted cocoa powder. Tap out the excess cocoa.
2. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
3. Sift together the flour, cocoa powder, baking soda, baking powder, and salt into a bowl and set aside.
4. Put the chocolate in a heatproof bowl and pour the boiling water over it. Whisk until the chocolate is melted. Let the mixture cool for 15 minutes.
5. In a separate bowl, whisk together the buttermilk and vanilla. Set aside.
6. In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the whisk attachment, whisk the eggs on high speed until foamy, about 2 minutes. Reduce the speed to low and slowly pour in the oil, whisking until combined, about 30 seconds. Raise the speed to medium and whisk until fully incorporated, about 30 seconds longer.
7. Reduce the speed to low and slowly pour the cooled chocolate mixture into the egg mixture. Slowly pour in the buttermilk and vanilla mixture. Add the sugar and whisk until the batter is smooth and liquid, about 2 minutes.
8. Stop the mixer. Remove the bowl and add the sifted dry ingredients and mix until just incorporated, preferably by hand, lifting and folding in from the bottom center. Using a rubber spatula, scrape down the sides of the bowl and mix again just briefly by hand. The batter may still look a little lumpy, but stop mixing.
9. Pour the batter through a medium-mesh sieve into a large measuring cup or bowl to remove any lumps. Press against the solids in the sieve with a rubber spatula to push through as much batter as possible, then discard the lumps. Divide the batter between the prepared pans. Bake until the tops spring back when lightly pressed and a tester inserted in the centers comes out clean, about 45 minutes.
10. Transfer to wire racks and let cool in the pans for about 20 minutes. When the cakes are cooled enough to handle the pans but still a tad warm to the touch, carefully run an offset spatula around the edges of the pans to loosen them, then invert the cakes onto the racks and remove the pans. (Note: If you are making the Old-Fashioned Cake and therefore using a contour pan, just invert the pans and drop them sharply onto the racks; they should fall out cleanly. Using an offset spatula in a contour pan will mar the edges of the cake.) Let cool for about 20 minutes longer. Wrap the cakes tightly in plastic wrap and refrigerate to ensure that the interiors are completely cooled before decorating, at least 1 hour or for up to 3 days. To freeze, wrap tightly in a second layer of plastic and store in the freezer up to 2 months.
Whipped Dark Chocolate Frosting
2 cups heavy cream
15 ounces bittersweet chocolate chips or chunks
pinch salt
1/4 cup mascarpone
8 ounces cream cheese
Heat heavy cream up until just before boiling.  Pour over chocolate and allow to sit until melted.  Stir in salt, and stir until smooth.  Allow to cool completely.  Whip until light and fluffy, then whip in mascarpone and cream cheese.  

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