Category: classics

by Rachel Sally

Worth It

It’s rainy sunny zebra weather, as I called it when I was little.
Boy, I thought I was a clever little imp.
Either way, it is h-o-t.
And very humid.
(And damp.  Note the photos.)
The last thing I want to be doing in this kind of weather is cooking running to urgent care to get my finger mended.
Alas… While making this pie, that is exactly what I ended up having to do.
Was it worth it?
Definitely not.  But the pie is all kinds of awesome, so that’s at least a plus.
I love key lime pie.
It’s one of my favorite kinds of pie.  It’s up there with peach and apple and nutmeg-maple cream.  
(And crack.)
So, while meandering through the grocery store, when a bag of key limes caught my eye, I had to snatch them up.
 
Side note: it still amazes me how cheap produce gets in the summer.  
Ataulfo mangoes are 2/$5 in the winter.  
Now, they are piling up in giant mounds and being sold 5/$5.
Key limes are cheap, too.
I guess it’s just funny because I always think of winter as the citrus/tropical fruit season, but that’s only because nothing else is in season- it’s just a default!
Anyways, back to pie.
This pie is healthified- just a little.  
Instead of butter, there’s coconut oil (which gives a boost of flavor as well as health).
Instead of egg yolks, there’s neufchatel.
The graham crackers are homemade with 100% whole wheat flour.
But you know what?  You wouldn’t know it.
In fact, my family didn’t know it.  The pie was gone by the next day.  There are only 4 of us in the house.  It went quick.

This pie tastes better than many key lime pies and is so much easier without the baking of the interior.  It’s quick and has some health boosts to boot.  I’ll take it!
(And it’ll take my finger.)
 
P.S. A note about the coconut graham crackers- you could make them vegan by swapping golden syrup or agave for the honey.
Icebox Key Lime Pie
ingredients:
about 2/3 batch of graham crackers, recipe below
4 tablespoons coconut oil, liquid
1 14-ounce can sweetened condensed milk (I used fat-free)
6 ounces neufchatel cheese
1/2 cup key lime juice
zest of 3 key limes, optional
directions:
Pulse the graham crackers in a food processor until they are crumbs.
Add in the coconut oil and pulse until the crumbs are all moistened.
Press into a 9-inch pie pan and chill while you prepare the filling.
Whip the sweetened condensed milk, the neufchatel, and the key lime juice together until they are homogeneous.
Stir in the zest.
Pour into your prepared crust and allow to chill in the fridge until set, about 3 hours.
 
Coconut Graham Crackers
adapted from Smitten Kitchen
ingredients:
2 1/2 cups plus 2 tablespoons (375 grams) white whole wheat flour (you could sub 2 cups AP and make the rest regular whole wheat)
1 cup (176 grams) brown sugar
1 teaspoon (6 grams) baking soda
3/4 teaspoon kosher salt (4 grams)
7 tablespoons (100 grams) coconut oil, solid but not hard
1/2 cup (171 grams) honey
2 tablespoons (27 grams) vanilla extract
directions:
Combine the flour, sugar, baking soda, and salt in the bowl of a stand mixer.
Cut the coconut oil into small chunks and add it into the mixture.
Once the mixture resembles coarse sand, add in the honey and vanilla extract and mix just until combined.
Wrap in plastic wrap and chill for 30 minutes.
Roll out the dough to 1/8 inch thick and cut it with a knife into rough squares (they don’t need to look even mildly good/accurate, since we’ll be grinding them up).
Poke each square with a fork and put onto baking sheets.
Bake for 15-18 minutes, until golden and fragrant.
Let cool before using in any recipes.
by Rachel Sally

‘Murka

 
 
Bottom line, I love America, I do.
With all these recent events, I am even gladder to live in this country.
We are on our way to a happier and more equal state, with more love and more satisfaction.
I’m glad to be part of the ride.
Happy birthday America.  Keep up the good work.
 
 
Let’s celebrate with barbecues (if this blasted rain will stop…), fireworks, and red-white-and-blue foods.
Let’s celebrate with these patriotic shortcakes.
Crunchy, sugar-spangled biscuits filled with blueberries and strawberries and pourable cream cheese.
They’re not too sweet, but devastatingly summery.
 
Catch y’all on the other side. 
 
 
Patriotic Shortcakes
for the biscuits:
adapted from Dot’s Diner, via Bon Appétit via Smitten Kitchen
ingredients:
2 1/4 cups flour
2 tablespoons sugar
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 scant teaspoon kosher salt
3/4 teaspoon baking soda
9 tablespoons cold butter, cubed
3/4 cup buttermilk, cold
half and half or cream, for brushing
1/4 cup turbinado sugar, optional, for sprinkling
directions:
Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.
Stir the flour, sugar, salt, baking powder and baking soda together in a bowl.
Cut in the cubed butter, either with a pastry cutter or with two knives or with your fingers, which is how I do it.
Flatten each of the cubes and rub them so that they are flat and pea-sized.
Pour in the buttermilk and bring the whole batter together with a few kneading motions- your hands will be very dirty, but that’s good for you.
Turn the dough out onto a floured surface and pat into a rectangle 1/2 inch thick.  
Make a letter fold, by folding it into thirds, and pat the resulting rectangle out to 1/2 inch thickness as well.
Repeat the letter fold twice more.
Pat out the dough and cut circles out of it, being careful not to mangle the edges.
Place on a baking sheet and brush with half-and-half.
Sprinkle liberally with turbinado sugar.
Bake for 12-15 minutes.
Split and fill!
for the berries:
ingredients:
1 cup of sliced strawberries (slice, then measure)
2/3 cup blueberries
1+ tablespoon of sugar
directions:
Gently stir the strawberries and blueberries together with the sugar and set aside, preferably in a fridge, to macerate for at least 20 minutes.
Adjust the amount of sugar depending on the sweetness of your berries.
for the cream cheese filling:
4 ounces cream cheese
2 tablespoons heavy cream
2 tablespoons powdered sugar
directions:
In a food processor or with an immersion blender, mix until pourable. 
Add more cream if need be, but be sure to fully mix the sauce before adding more.
by Rachel Sally

Mac Attack

Because it’s impossible not to smile while eating a pink cookie with sprinkles.
Because why not trash up a classic French pastry with America’s favorite flavor? (Birthday cake, duh.)
AKA funfetti.
AKA sprinkles.
Just look at these cute little macs.  
They’re pink.  And sprinkled.  And yes, they taste like birthday cake.
I think I’m finally getting the hang of making macarons!
 
I thought I would share a few of my personal tips and tricks for macaron success, although I won’t lie and say that making these cookies isn’t still stressful or difficult or volatile… I have shells that crack too, it’s just that now I better understand/can better explain these fatalities.
1.  I no longer make macarons the French way, which involves heating egg whites with sugar over a double boiler and then making a meringue.
This process is identical to making a Swiss meringue, which I no longer do either. (more on this in an upcoming post!)
Rather, I use the Italian (sucre cuit, cooked sugar) method to make my macarons (and buttercream, but like I said… hold your horses for an in-depth tutorial).
This involves mixing half of your egg whites with almond meal and confectioner’s sugar, and making a cooked meringue with a hot sugar syrup and the other half of the egg whites.
You then marry the two mixtures by performing macaronage, or folding and gently mixing, and finally, you pipe out your shells.
 
2.  I don’t worry about the age or temperature of my egg whites (thanks, Stella!).  To be honest, however, I almost always have aged egg whites stored in my fridge from recipes needing only or mostly yolks, and these are the whites I use most often for making meringue buttercreams or macarons.  
However, if I don’t have the full weight of whites needed, I’ll simply crack open a fresh egg.  
It theoretically shouldn’t matter, and I don’t find that it does.
P.S. If you haven’t been saving your unused, unloved egg whites, shame on you!
That’s money down the drain!
Save them and use them in buttercream or macarons or angel food cake, or feed your dog a nice egg white omelet to make their coat super shiny and soft.
Waste not want not!
 
3. I mix my (gel) food coloring in with my almond flour- not my meringue.  
I find that this better distributes the color and ensures that there are no pockets of food coloring that can lead to streaks and holes in your macarons.
When I am partially mixing my almond flour, confectioner’s sugar, and half of the egg whites, I also add in a dab of food coloring (Wilton Rose, for these shells) and gently mix until the mixture is dusty and dry but streaked and there are no globs of food coloring.
 
4.  I let my shells dry before baking.  
This is something a lot of people don’t buy into, but I’ve found that the extra 30 minute drying period really helps ensure that my shells have feet and don’t crack.  
Regardless of others’ experiences, this is what has consistently worked for me.
Different strokes for different folks.
 
5.  I never use silpats.  
Seriously, people, parchment is best for macarons.  
I find that silpats stick and tend to pull the bottom right off my macs.  They’re impossible to pry off, and I end up gouging giant holes in the bottom or cracking the shells right in half when I try to wrench them off of a silpat with a paring knife.
Not a pretty scene, take it from me.
 
6. I use heavy-duty sheet pans, or double up on flimsier ones.  
This is a big help with cracking, which generally occurs when the inside/bottom of the shell is cooking too fast, causing the interior to expand and the top to rupture.  
Using thick (or double) sheet pans also prevents the bottoms of the macs from browning, which is not quite so pretty but still tasty.
If you have trouble with cracking, try using two sheet pans for your macarons.  
It just might help. 

These aren’t the easiest baking project in the world, and are somewhat fussy little cookies.
But once you find a set of guidelines that work for you, you may just be swept away by the macaron mania. 
There are endless possibilities for these little French cuties, and you can mix and match shells and fillings to your hearts delight.  
The filling recipe that I’ve created for these is scary in that it tastes exactly like the frosting out of a can- in a good way.  
 
I will admit that it is slightly less sweet and a bit more creamy, but it is nearly an exact copy-cat.
How did I make this up?  I threw a bunch of stuff in a bowl, tasted, adjusted, tasted, adjusted, and, once satisfied, licked the rest of the bowl (after all those tastings, there wasn’t much left anyways!).
Who needs fillings for macarons anyways?!
 
Pulling a successful batch of macarons out of your oven is reason for celebration unto itself, so why not celebrate with cake?

 

Birthday Cake Macarons
for the shells:
adapted from DessertFirst Girl
ingredients:
100 grams almond flour
100 grams confectioner’s sugar
200 grams sugar
50 grams water
pinch of cream of tartar
150 grams egg whites, divided into 2 75-gram portions
approximately 1/4 teaspoon pink gel food coloring
directions:
Line 2 or 3 heavy duty baking sheets with parchment paper.
In a food processor, process the almond flour and confectioner’s sugar.
Dump into a bowl with 75 grams of the egg whites and the pink food coloring.
Mix partially with a spatula until mostly combined but still streaked with dry ingredients.
Meanwhile, combine the sugar and the water in a saucepan.
Cook the syrup to 245 degrees F.
While the syrup is cooking, whip the second 75 gram portion of egg whites with a pinch of cream of tartar.
The egg whites should be just a tiny bit shy of stiff peaks when the syrup comes to temperature.  
The peaks should be stiff, just not dry.
Once the whites have whipped and the syrup is up to temp, slowly and carefully drizzle the syrup over the meringue with the mixer on low, until all of the syrup is used up.
Beat on high until cooled slightly.
The meringue should be smooth, thick, and glossy, and hold a “beak” on the end of your whisk.
Scoop all of the meringue on top of the almond meal mixture and begin to fold and turn your batter.
Continue to turn and scrape the bowl while folding the mixture until it falls in a ribbon and flows like magma.  
The ribbon that cascades off of your spatula should disappear into the mixture after 10 seconds.  (Please see Anita or Heather’s picture tutorials for a clearer idea.)
Place batter into a pastry bag fitted with a plain tip and pipe 1 inch circles onto your baking sheets.
Preheat oven to 320-325 degrees F while shells dry.
Bake for 15 minutes, changing the top rack to the bottom and vice versa halfway through the baking. 
Shells are done when one can be lifted cleanly and easily off of the parchment, with no browning on the bottom.
Allow to cool on a wire rack.
for the faux canned frosting:
ingredients:
115 grams (1 stick, 8 tablespoons) unsalted butter, softened
3 tablespoons cream cheese, softened
1+ cup confectioner’s sugar (this is to taste; I always add less confectioner’s sugar and build my way up, tasting as I go.  I prefer things much less sweet, so I advise you to taste as you go with any recipe, as they often call for a lot of sugar.  What I have listed here is my preference and is not too sweet.)
1/4 cup heavy cream
1/2 cup milk powder
pinch salt
splash vanilla extract
splash butter extract (trust me!)
directions:
Beat butter and cream cheese on high until very creamy and smooth.  
Scrape sides and beat in confectioner’s sugar.
Mixture should be fluffy and light.
Add in the heavy cream and beat to combine- mixture may look curdled.
Add in the milk powder and beat on low to combine.
Add in the salt and extracts and beat on high.
If mixture is too runny, add a bit more confectioner’s sugar and/or milk powder.
If it is too thick, add in heavy cream or half and half a teaspoon at a time- it can go from too thick to runny very quickly, so beat well between additions.
to assemble the macarons:
ingredients:
shells
frosting
sprinkles
directions:
Spread half of the shells with about a teaspoon and a half of the filling, then sandwich with another shell.
Fill a small bowl with sprinkles, then roll the edges of each macaron in the sprinkles.
There should be enough filling exposed on the edges to pick up sprinkles around the middle of the mac.
Allow to “mature” overnight if possible, but definitely allow the flavors and textures at least 2 hours to mingle and get comfortable before eating.
Enjoy!

by Rachel Sally

Spectrum

Remember how I said that people like to shove cookie butter into every dessert imaginable?
 
Well then, this swap of cookie butter for peanut butter should come as no surprise to you.
Cookie butter cups!  
The only problem with these is that the cookie butter mixture for the middle has to be formed into little patties- if it were more liquid and pourable, the little cups would have even tops, just like the peanut butter cups we all know and love.
A lumpy top is but a small price to pay for these.
 
The dark chocolate combines with the spices to give two or three perfectly creamy and balanced bites from each confection. (and then you reach for another… and another…)
Bonus?  They’re super quick and easy to make.
(I tempered my chocolate, which takes a bit longer, but feel free to add a teaspoon of shortening and a teaspoon of corn syrup to melted chocolate to make an approximation!)
This is a peanut butter cup.  This is a peanut butter cup on drugs…

 

Speculoos Cups
makes about 9
adapted from the Little Kitchen
ingredients:
1/4 cup speculoos spread (make your own!)
1 1/2 tablespoons butter
pinch of salt
1/4 cup powdered sugar
about 2 cups dark chocolate, tempered (or see approximation above)
directions:
Put cookie butter and butter in microwave and heat in 30 second bursts until melted.
Stir in salt and powdered sugar until a thick paste forms.
Set out 9 cupcake liners and drop about a teaspoon of chocolate into the bottom of each.
Form small patties of speculoos mixture and nestle them into the chocolate.
Finish each cup by filling it with chocolate until the patty is covered.
Allow to set by placing in the freezer or fridge, then unwrap and enjoy!

by Rachel Sally

Speckled

Part III.  Gird your loins.
Here’s an easy fix for any (and all) cravings.
Puppy chow/muddy buddies are a classic childhood treat.
I remember making these when I was in elementary school.
Melt (peanut butter), chocolate, butter, add Chex, finish with a heaping pile of confectioner’s sugar.
They couldn’t be easier.  Really.
In this case, I’ve swapped the peanut butter for cookie butter.
Now, these little guys are sweetly spiced, but still crunchy, sweet, and very addictive.
It’s important not to zone out around puppy chow- before you know it, the whole batch is gone! 
And then you have to make more…
Rather than going with all semi-sweet chocolate, I swapped half for milk and half for white chocolate.
The milkiness of this combination really plays off of the deep brown sugar in the cookie butter.
They’re divine and so simple to make!
More good news?  I have an even easier cookie butter recipe coming stat.
Two more recipes, and I think my speculoos reserve will be all used up!


Biscoff Muddy Buddies
adapted from Chex
ingredients:
9 cups Rice Chex or other Chex cereal
2 ounces (1/4 cup, 4 tablespoons) butter
1/2 cup biscoff spread (make your own!)
2 milk chocolate bars, coarsely chopped, or about 1/2 cup milk chocolate chips
enough white chocolate chips to make 1 cup of chocolate when combined with the roughly chopped milk chocolate (chop the milk chocolate and add it to a 1 cup measure, then fill to the top with white chocolate chips) (approximately 1/2 cup)
1 1/2 cups powdered sugar
directions:
Brown the butter in a heavy bottomed saucepan.
Add in the speculoos spread and the chocolate and stir to melt and combine.
Pour mixture over the cereal and stir very well until every piece is coated- this will take a little while, maybe 3 or 4 minutes, gently folding with a spatula, as the mixture is very thick.
Place 1/2 cup of powdered sugar in the bottom of a gallon ziplock bag.
Add in 1/2 of the coated cereal, then add another 1/2 cup powdered sugar over the cereal.  
Add the rest of the cereal, and put the last 1/2 cup powdered sugar over that.
Zip the bag and gently toss around so that all of the cereal is coated with powdered sugar.

by Rachel Sally

Pitter Pater

Happy Father’s Day!
Especially to my wonderful father, who is currently in London. 
(I know.  He missed out on father’s day.  I shouldn’t be baking him anything!!)
Shout out to you, Pops!
Father’s day seems to be about doing classic flavors in a new way… 
Last year was an Elvis cake, based on the famous friend banana and peanut butter sandwiches that the King loved.
This year, I made knockoff Little Debbie Oatmeal Cream Pies.  You know, the ones you remember from your childhood.  Soft, squidgy, filled with marshmallow and only slightly spicy.
My dad loves soft, chewy oatmeal cookies, and I know he likes OCPs.
When I found Stella of BraveTart’s recipe, I knew I had to make them.
The cookies aren’t exactly intuitive in the making, but once you bite into one, you know exactly what they’re supposed to be.  They taste amazingly similar to the store-bought, factory-processed cookies, but fresher and better, and slightly more complex as well.
I had to ship these internationally to my dad, and I’m just hoping that they get to him on time, before he leaves to come back to America.
If they don’t, it’s his loss, right?  That’s what you get for ditching your kid on Father’s Day.
Just kidding.  I love you, Daddy, and miss you even more.  
I hope you like the cookies.
Head here for the full Oatmeal Creme Pie recipe: these are dead ringers for the real deal OCPs.
The ingredients list is a little strange and involved, but it’s totally worth it.
Also, be sure to take your cookies out after exactly 8 minutes: they should be completely puffy and really soft- practically not baked at all, just warmed.  Once you take them out of the oven, they will fall and become very chewy and soft, just the way they should be.
by Rachel Sally

Raisin in the Sun

Or does it explode?
It’s hot, hot, hot.
Summer is coming.
The other day, it was about 90 degrees here in Ithaca, which translates to approximately 110 degrees on the inside of a certain little red Volvo.
Obviously, I raced home and did the one thing any sane person would do in the heat:
I turned on my oven.
My pup has never faired well in the heat, but as she ages, it becomes even more difficult for her.
Her lethargy is taken to a whole new level.
The other day, I took her on a walk (it was cool, but the sun was very strong), and, right in the middle of it, she sat down.
And refused to move.
She is no lightweight, either.  When a 95-100 lb chocolate lab makes up her mind to sit, your walking plans better change, pronto.
What ensued must have looked hilarious to passerby, but was most certainly not amusing for me.
We had stopped at the bottom of a shallow hill.
When Ginger decided she could take no more and wanted to go back, I realized her mortal mistake, but it would take her a few more minutes to come to the same realization.
We had to turn around and go UP the hill.  In the sun.  
Actually, she didn’t go up the hill.  She sat.
I pulled.  I pushed.  I wanted to carry her, but that would have been a feat perhaps to great for me.
I was sweating.
She was panting.
I was mad.
She sat.
When we got home, the poor old dear was panting so heavily, she sounded the way I do when I’m having a panic attack.
She slumped down on the cool stone floor of our porch.
I set a bowl of ice water near her and strategically placed a fan aimed at her belly.  
So lazy was she that she could not even get up to drink the water.
I had to push it closer so that she could half drink it by flopping over on her side.  
I mean, really?
Alright, ready for me to bring this back around to rugelach?
Ready?
We got Ginger when I was 7- my mom likes to say that we were puppies together.  
At that point in my life, I was still a good little devout Catholic and my family attended church every Sunday, without fail.
Um… Best part about church?  You always got doughnuts or cookies afterwards at the faith group that met on Sundays.
Ithaca Bakery, here in town, makes killer rugelach.
Rugelach that we often indulged in on Sundays.
(I know, Jewish cookies for Catholics.  Cookie love unites all!!)
Ithaca Bakery makes their rugelach in scrolls, like those shown, rather than the more traditional crescent shape.
When I first saw the rugelach in Dorie Greenspan’s book, I was very confused.
Those were not rugelach.
I did not trust these strange moon shaped cookies.
Surely they were not those that I knew and loved.
Turns out, they are.  Egads!
 
 
I find that the scroll shape holds the innards in far better than do the crescents, and it’s the shape I like, so I stuck with it.  
Feel free to shape the cookies into crescents if you so desire.
I slicked my dough with a thin layer of apricot jam, then a sprinkle of cinnamon sugar, and finally, a thin topping of walnuts and raisins.
You could do raspberry jam, or orange marmalade- or anything- run with it!
Same goes for the nuts.  Use whatever floats your boat.
I’m also thinking of some rugelach with sour cherries or golden raisins.  Yum.
The key to your filling not spilling out and burning the bottoms of your cookies to kingdom come is to be frugal with it.  Trust me.
 
With rugelach, it’s all about the shatteringly flaky pastry.  This pastry is seriously flaky, people.  Like, crumbs everywhere-unless-you-eat-it-in-one-go type flaky.
If that doesn’t convince you to make these, then I don’t know what will.
 
Anyways, me and Ginge enjoyed a few of these cookies together, just like the good old days.
She approves.  

Rugelach
for the dough:
from Dorie Greenspan
ingredients:
4 ounces cream cheese, cut into 1/2 ounce pieces
8 tablespoons butter, cut into tablespoon-sized pieces
1 cup all purpose flour
3/8 teaspoon kosher salt (she calls for 1/4 teaspoon of regular salt; I always prefer to use kosher or sea salt and I generally use pinches rather than measurements; here, a good, hearty 2 pinches will do.)
directions:
Place flour and salt in the bowl of a food processor and pulse to combine.  Sprinkle the chunks of cream cheese and butter over the top of the flour and pulse until a rough dough forms.  
Gently form dough into a ball and wrap in plastic wrap.  
Flatten slightly and refrigerate. 
to assemble:
ingredients:
apricot or raspberry jam
3/4 cup sugar mixed with 2 teaspoons cinnamon
2 handfuls of raisins
chopped walnuts
1 egg mixed very well with 1 half egg-shell full of water
directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
Roll out your dough into a rectangle that is 1/8-1/4 inch thick.
Spread a thin, thin, thin layer of jam all over the dough.
Sparsely sprinkle a thin layer of cinnamon sugar all over the dough, then press a handful of raisins and walnuts over the sugar.  
Do not fill your dough too full with the fillings, because they will leak out and burn in the oven.
Roll up your dough rectangle tightly (roll starting with the long end of the rectangle, NOT the short, unless you want gigantic rugelach).
Cut into 1-inch wide pieces, and place 1 inch apart on a baking sheet.
Brush lightly with egg wash, and sprinkle more cinnamon sugar on top.
Bake for 10-12 minutes, until puffed, golden, and crispy.

by Rachel Sally

Time is Deceiving

 
Because sometimes, even when celebrating is the last thing in the world that you want to do, you still need cake.
 
 
Happy birthday to my big brother, Tom.
 
I love you.
 
Chris, you are in our hearts and on our minds and we will continue to search.
We will not give up.
We love you.
 
Readers, I write this through my tears.  
I will not be posting for the next few days.
 
For those of you in the Ithaca area:  please come out and help us search for Chris.  
We just want need to bring him home.
Search party organization and information can be found here and here.
{Cake and frosting from Sky High.  Find the full recipe here.}
by Rachel Sally

Love’s Light Wings

“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose
by any name would smell as sweet…”
Romeo and Juliet, Act II Scene II
 
Yesterday, I ran a marathon.  
 
Which is my excuse for not having a WISE blog post in more than a week.
It’s also my excuse for being late to all my classes today.
Stairs are just a wee bit difficult today.
 
Here’s a Super Sad True Love Story super short true summary of the super long (26.2 mile) race:
(I break long runs into chunks… I like to pretend that it makes it less mentally exhausting.  
It doesn’t.  But hey.)
 
Miles 1-8 are terrifying.  In the beginning, I’m stiff and aching and tired, which makes me very nervous for what’s ahead, seeing as I’m huffing and puffing and I’ve only run 2 miles.  
Luckily, by mile 6, I’m locked and loaded on cruise control.
At which point, I look at my Garmin and realize, 
I have 20 miles to go.  Jésus Marià.
 
Miles 8-13 are spent surreptitiously looking at my fellow runners’ shoes, to see which of them have the bright orange D tags which were only given to marathon runners to record times.  I have the sinking realization that there aren’t many runners around me with tags.
 
Miles 13-20 are my fastest.  I spend time listening to “I Don’t Care” by Iconapop.  As in, on repeat for about 50 minutes.  No shame.
I pick out runners to pass and do so by powering through all of the water stations- I keep the word “slingshot” in my head and will myself not to stop or slow down, and in doing so, spill about 4 brimming cupfuls of bright orange Gatorade down my white shirt.  Good looks.
 
Miles 20-25 are grueling.  The stations ran out of power gels around mile 18, and my own supply has also been completely diminished.  My glycogen is running on red and I am not a happy camper.
I keep thinking why the hell Pheidippides didn’t take a damn horse.
Seriously, what in god’s name was wrong with him?  
 
25-26.2 are like running another 12 miles.  Where was the finish line again?
Why do I still see people running?  
Are we done yet?
My intended mile split was a 10:25.  I ended up finishing 23 seconds ahead of that, with a 10:02 average mile split.  I’m not the fastest, that’s fo’ sho.  Honestly I’m just glad to have crossed the finish line!!!
 
(Turns out, I finished first in my division, female 15-19 year olds.  That was a surprise!)
Back to our regularly scheduled program: WISE jabber.
 
In class today, I had a revelation: in truth, I’ve been doing plenty of “research,” which is basically just utilizing different sources. 
What I haven’t been doing is keeping a proper log of said resources- different blogs and cookbooks etc.- which means that I have some serious back work to do.  Ahem.
Also, I received my time slot for my presentation!
June 10th from 3-4 PM.  More details later.
 
I chose the name of this post, and the intro, because a) it’s one of Shakespeare’s most classic, and one of my favorite, scenes and b) because the dessert I’m showing to you is a misnomer and should have a different name.
Right? Right.
 
This dessert is based on a deconstruction of the famous German chocolate cake.
Which, in truth, is not the slightest bit German.
It’s based off of a recipe that appeared in 1957 in a newspaper’s recipe of the day column, which used a type of chocolate that had been developed more than a century earlier, in 1852, by Sam German, a worker in the Baker’s chocolate factory; it was a sweeter dark baking chocolate, which was marketed as Baker’s German Sweet Chocolate.
Thus was the German chocolate cake born, a coconut and pecan and chocolate melange that is not the most attractive, but one of the more delicious.
German cake≠German.  Confusing, I know.
(This information is from The Baker Chocolate Company: A Sweet History by Anthony M. Sammarco, googlebook accessed via Wikipedia.)
 
This dessert has the added benefit of being completely vegan.  
 
I’m thinking of using a version of this for my presentation, because it would be incredibly easy to make gluten-free, thus making it almost entirely allergy-free (it does have coconut and pecan… those are kind of unavoidable) and a good dessert to share with many people who may have various allergies.
I plated it two ways because I couldn’t get a quenelle to smooth out the first go-round and I ended up disliking the chocolate flecks on the first few plates.
 
(P.S. remember how I was so pumped about my quenelles a few WISE posts back?  
Yeah, those darned footballs are coming back to bite me in the butt.  It took me a good 5 minutes to get the quenelle you see perfectly smooth.  My family keeps recycling the containers I use for my ice cream, so that’s not helping…)
 
*Note to my father:  Can you please, please, please stop recycling the date containers that I diligently wash out and save?  You’re making my quenelles ten times more difficult than they need to be.  Thank you.  Loveyameanit.*
German
chocolate cake
salted caramel
bittersweet ganache
candied pecans
coconut ice cream
Mile 12.5.  Eating a gu and feeling güd.
 Mile 20.  The longest uphill slog of the course; it was gradual, but felt never ending. 
 
Mile 25; back on the streets.
Don’t let the smile fool you; I could barely remain standing long enough to rip off my water belt and iPod in order to take this photo.
 
“German”
 
for the cake:
ingredients:
1/2 cup flour
1/3 cup sugar
4 teaspoons extra dark cocoa powder
rounded 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/8 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons coconut oil, measured then melted
1 teaspoon apple cider vinegar
1/3 cup water
directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
Spray a six inch cake pan with baking spray.
Stir the flour, sugar, cocoa, baking soda, and salt together.
Add the coconut oil and vinegar, then the water, and stir it all together, gently.
Once it is just barely homogeneous, pour into the pan.
Bake for 20-25 minutes until the cake is springy to the touch and a tester comes out clean.
 
for the ganache:
ingredients:
2 ounces unsweetened chocolate, chopped finely
2 ounces sugar
2 ounces coconut milk, light or full-fat
1 tablespoon coconut oil
pinch kosher salt
directions:
Place the chocolate, oil, and salt in a bowl.
Heat the milk and sugar up together until boiling, then pour over the chocolate.
Allow to sit for 3 minutes, then stir together.
Blend with an immersion blender to emulsify.
 
for the caramel:
ingredients:
1/4 cup sugar
6 tablespoons coconut milk, light or full-fat
1 tablespoon coconut oil
liberal pinch kosher salt
directions:
Heat the sugar up in a heavy saucepan with tall sides until deep amber, about 7 minutes.
Once the sugar reaches the proper color, remove from heat and add the milk and oil.  
Mixture will bubble and sizzle violently.
Whisk until smooth, then add in the salt.  
If caramel gets a skin before use, just gently heat and stir to return it to proper consistency.
 
for the candied pecans:
ingredients:
1 tablespoon coconut oil
1/2 tablespoon balsamic vinegar
1/4 cup loosely packed brown sugar
pinch kosher salt
1/4 cup (you could go up to almost 1/2 cup with this amount of glaze; you’ll have extra if you use 1/4 cup) pecan halves
directions:
Toast the pecans lightly in a skillet, about 2 minutes.
In another saucepan, heat the oil, vinegar, sugar, and salt until bubbling.
Remove from heat and stir in pecans.
Pour mixture onto a sheet pan lined with silpat.
Allow to cool until glaze sets.
 
for the ice cream:
ingredients:
1 can (14 ounces) light coconut milk
1 tablespoon coconut oil
pinch salt
1/4 cup sugar
1 teaspoon cornstarch
directions:
Bring everything to a boil, whisking constantly.
Transfer to a blender canister and allow to sit for 4 minutes to cool.
Blend, being careful to vent the blender and cover with a towel to protect yourself from hot splashes, until frothy and homogeneous.
Allow to cool to room temperature, then freeze in your ice cream machine.
Store in freezer until use.
 
to assemble:
toasted coconut
directions:
Plate the caramel sauce and the ganache first; either smear them both across the plate or use a fork’s tines to splatter the chocolate onto the plate.
Arrange cake crumbles on one end of the smears; follow with candied pecans.
Carefully place coconut where desired.
Finish with a scoop or quenelle of coconut ice cream.