Category: love

by Rachel Sally

감사합니다

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I’m thankful for home.

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I’m grateful to be surrounded by love and warmth and family.

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This brief respite has been much needed, and much appreciated.

It saddens me to leave (tomorrow), but I am comforted with the knowledge that I will be back in just a few short weeks.

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I love my home: my house, my friends, my family, my town.

I love this place.

I was dearly missing this place.

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I thought I’d share some snapshots of home with you; the first photo is of my beloved bed, where I haven’t been spending enough time this break. (Too many things to do!  People to see!  Places to go!)

You get a preview of our holiday cards (blech) and some cute photos of my kitten and pup.

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Also, THANKS GUYS, for being awesome and reading these stupid posts of mine on this silly little blog.

You rock.  Thanks for that.  I sure do appreciate you.

Now, food.

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Thanksgiving Menu 2013:

Roasted roots: herbed sweet potatoes, parsnips, and carrots with honey mustard aioli (GF)

Roasted brown butter and maple Brussels sprouts (GF)

Honey glazed turkey with giblet gravy (GF)

Maple and apple cranberry sauce (GF)

Cornbread stuffing with spiced sausages, pecans, sage, and celery (GF)

Goat cheese, buttermilk, and olive oil mashed potatoes (GF)

Whole wheat butternut squash mac and cheese

Mixed green salad with pomegranates, walnuts, shaved fennel, apples, and Parmesan with pomegranate dressing (GF)

Butterscotch and thyme apple pie (GF)

Maple kefir brûlée tart (GF)

Pumpkin roll with Frangelico and mascarpone whipped cream, brown butter glaze, chopped pecans (GF)

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Yes, I made all of that myself.  Boy, was it a marathon.  A very, very, very, long and delicious haul.

My photos were all very rushed and poorly lit; I had hoped to show you pictures of all the gluten free goodies I made, but no such luck.

At least I got a picture of the pumpkin roll cake… So I can torture you with yet another pumpkin recipe!

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This will be the last pumpkin recipe of the year.

It’s one to remember: light, fluffy pumpkin sponge cake rolled around mascarpone and maple whipped cream, topped with brown butter and Frangelico glaze and chopped pecans.

You might just be inspired to pull out one last can of pumpkin.

Happy Thanksgiving (weekend), y’all.

Thanksgiving (scaled)

 Pumpkin Roll Cake

ingredients:
for the cake:
powdered sugar, for sprinkling on towel
90 grams (3/4 cup) flour
½ teaspoon baking powder
½ teaspoon baking soda
cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg, ginger, pepper, coriander
pinch salt
3 large eggs
200 grams (1 cup) sugar
2/3 cup pumpkin puree
for the filling:
1 cup whipped cream
1 cup mascarpone
¼ cup powdered sugar
2 tablespoons maple syrup
pinch salt

for the glaze:
4 tablespoons butter, browned
2/3 cup powdered sugar
1/3 cup powdered milk
2 tablespoons maple syrup
2 teaspoons Frangelico (optional)

For garnish:
Chopped pecans

Directions:
For the cake, preheat oven to 350 degrees F.  Grease and flour a sheet pan very well; line with parchment paper.
Sprinkle a dishtowel with powdered sugar.
Whisk the flour, leaveners, spices, and salt together.
Beat the yolks and ¼ cup of the sugar very well, then stir in pumpkin.
Sift the flour mixture over the yolks and fold in gently.
Whip the egg whites and remaining sugar to stiff peaks.
Fold into the pumpkin mixture, then spread the batter out onto your prepared pan.
Bake for 15 minutes, until set.
Flip over onto towel and let cool for 5 minutes.
Gently roll up the cake and set aside to cool completely.
For the filling, beat the whipped cream to soft peaks, then gently beat in the other ingredients.
Spread onto the cooled, unrolled cake, then reroll the cake.
For the glaze, mix everything together until no lumps remain; drizzle over the rolled cake.
Garnish with chopped pecans.

by Rachel Sally

Fallin’ For You

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“Best of all he loved the fall
The leaves yellow on the cottonwoods
Leaves floating on the trout streams
And above the hills
The high blue windless skies
Now he will be a part of them forever.”

-Ernest Hemingway

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I have very distinct and fond memories of apple cider donuts.
They epitomize fall for me.

Going to Hollenbeck’s to get cider and hot, fresh apple cider cake donuts… That’s heaven.

The scent of fried dough and cinnamon, mixed with hot, sweet apple cider… That’s autumn.

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I made these donuts prior to leaving *my* kitchen for college.
Most of my posts for the next week or so will be like this… I somehow managed to plan ahead, which makes each of these posts a rare bird.
However, my first real-time, real-life, real-talk college (cawledgeeeee) post may very well be coming soon, because one of my new friends (I know… Whaaa?!?) has a birthday in a few short days and has requested chocolate cake… It may be a good excuse to get into the kitchen!
(As if I needed one.)

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The recipe for these donuts (doughnuts?) comes from the wonderful Deb of Smitten Kitchen.
They’re a bit different from apple cider donuts that one would get at a cider mill or apple orchard, because most of those operations have donut droppers that can release a perfect donut shaped ring of loose cake batter into hot oil.
Most people at home don’t have these contraptions, so homemade fried cake donuts have to be made with a thicker dough, like an extra puffy, soft cookie dough.
Due to this fact, the donuts aren’t smooth and curvy.  They’ve got edges.  It’s okay.  It happens.
Ugly donuts are still donuts.  Trust me on that one.
They still taste like a piece of fried fall heaven.

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Apple Cider Doughnuts
makes about 16
from Smitten Kitchen
ingredients:
1 cup apple cider
3 1/2 cups AP flour, plus extra from dusting
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
scant 1 teaspoon kosher salt
1/8 teaspoon freshly ground nutmeg
4 tablespoons butter
1 cup sugar
2 eggs
1/2 cup buttermilk
shortening, for frying
Cinnamon sugar (1 cup granulated sugar+1 1/2 tablespoons cinnamon)
Powdered sugar

directions:
Reduce the apple cider by 4, so that you have about 1/4 cup of thickened cider, about 30 minutes over low heat.
Whisk the flour, spices, baking powder, baking soda, and salt together.
Cream the butter and sugar together until light and fluffy.
Add the eggs one at a time, then whisk the buttermilk and cider together and pour into the butter mixture.
Scrape the sides very well, and beat to make sure everything is incorporated before adding the dry ingredients in.
Mix only until the dough comes together.
Turn it out onto a very well floured and parchment-lined baking sheet and pat to a thickness of 1/2 an inch.
Freeze for 20 minutes, then cut out your doughnut shapes.
Put them in the fridge to rest while you heat the oil.
Heat the oil to 350 degrees F and line a baking sheet with plenty of paper towels.
Whisk the sugar and cinnamon together while the oil heats up.
When the oil comes to temp, fry your donuts until they are golden brown on each side, about 1 minute on the first side and 30 seconds to 1 minute on the second.
Remove them to the paper towel lined sheet for a minute or two before rolling them in the cinnamon sugar.
If you’re dusting them in powdered sugar, let them chill on the paper towels for 3 minutes before dusting.
If you don’t eat them right away, you’ll have to dust them in powdered sugar again before serving, as it will sink into the doughnuts.

 

by Rachel Sally

Gadzooks!

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Hello! Welcome to my first post on my “new” blog!

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I’ve spent a bunch of time designing this new website- what do y’all think?

I think it’s pretty shmancy, and I’m glad to have my own domain!

You can still access any/all of my posts (yes, even the really old embarrassing ones, though the formatting of those is a bit wonky- it didn’t transfer smoothly) and you can search for any items/ click through the tag cloud down at the bottom of the page.

Things should be quicker and less difficult, and hopefully prettier around here!

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Not much else will change- I’m still going to be posting about yummy treats like these cupcakes.

These little guys make use of something that most people are drowning in this time of year- zucchini!

Instead of baking it into a bread, I made tender little cupcakes.   Zucchini bread tends to be dense, which doesn’t translate well into cakes.

Luckily, these are soft and light, with a tight crumb and slightly crispy exterior.

I topped them with a fluffy lime cream frosting, made with mascarpone cheese.

The recipe is quite easy- it’s a two bowl, no mixer, 10 minute prep kind of cake.

In addition, it only makes 6 perfect little cakes!  Lovely when you don’t want an army of cupcakes to decorate, or you need a quick, sweet fix.

Enjoy, and, again, welcome to the new site!

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Zucchini Cupcakes with Lime Cream frosting

makes 6

for the cupcakes:

adapted from Chow

ingredients:

1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons AP flour

2 tablespoons cornstarch

1/4 teaspoon plus 1/8 teaspoon baking powder

1/4 teaspoon baking soda

1/4 teaspoon kosher salt

1 egg

1/4 cup packed brown sugar

1/4 cup sugar

1/4 cup vegetable oil

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

3.5 ounces zucchini (about 1 small/medium squash), grated on a box grater (scant 1 cup grated)

directions:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

Line 6 muffin tins with papers, or grease and flour them.

Whisk the flour, cornstarch, salt, baking powder, and baking soda together.

In another bowl, whisk the oil, egg, sugars, and vanilla together.

Whisk the two mixtures together, then whisk or fold in the zucchini.

Portion the batter out into your muffin tins and bake for 16-18 minutes, until a toothpick comes out clean.

Allow to cool before frosting.

for the lime cream frosting:

ingredients:

6 tablespoons butter, softened

6 tablespoons mascarpone cheese (you can substitute cream cheese here)

zest of one lime

juice of 1/2 a lime

1/3 cup nonfat milk powder

1 2/3 cup powdered sugar

directions:

Beat the mascarpone and butter together until fluffy.

Add in the lime zest and juice and mix until combined.

Add in the milk powder and powdered sugar slowly, while beating.

Continue to beat until frosting is fluffy.

Use immediately or refrigerate for up to 1 day.

by Rachel Sally

Subpar

 
It was my dad’s birthday today!
 
My dad is not your average father… So, obviously, I made him a not so average birthday cake.
It’s birthday cake… with a twist.
Actually, a few twists.
Or a few kicks.  However you want to say it.
 
I’m very tired while writing this post (on Sundays, the credits of Breaking Bad pretty much signal bedtime to me), so I’ll keep it short and hopefully sweet.
 
My dad is a wonderful human being.  Just superb.  I mean, really.
I could not ask for a more supportive, caring, and understanding father.
He is truly the rock to which I am tethered.
I could not have weathered any storms without him keeping me from blowing away.
 
He’s watching golf, now that we’ve finished Breaking Bad, which is maybe his only bad habit.
Watching golf.  Or maybe playing golf.
He just loves golf so much… I guess I forgive him for it.  Depending on my mood, that is.
BUT I should clarify the title of this post: I mean subpar in a golf way, not in a real world way.
Even though it’s not a term they use, I don’t think.
What I mean is that he’s better than average.
Or something like that.
I don’t know.  Stop looking at me like that.
So this cake… It’s spicy.
Spicy, sweet, and over-the-top.
It’s a rich chocolate cake with a silky cheesecake in the center, sandwiched with spicy strawberry-cayenne jam, frosted with a super smooth Italian meringue buttercream, and topped with cayenne-gianduja macarons.
 
Everything balances out very nicely:
deep, smoky chocolate
slightly sour, rich, thick cheesecake
spicy and tart strawberry
silkier than silky IMBC, which is super buttery and offsets the intense flavors well
slightly crispy, chewy macs with a hint of spice and gianduja (AKA nutella).
This is truly a celebration cake.  You can expect to see more macaron-topped cakes from me in the future.
Once I get my macs down perfectly, that is.
Happy birthday, Daddy!  I love you!
Kickin’ Chocolate Birthday Cake
 
Cayenne Gianduja Macarons
adapted from Jo the Tart Queen
ingredients:
for the first mixture:
70 grams egg whites
130 grams hazelnut flour
25 grams cocoa powder
150 grams powdered sugar
A few pinches cayenne pepper, depending how spicy you want the cookies
for the second mixture:
60 grams egg whites
Pinch cream of tartar
150 grams granulated sugar
30 grams water
directions:
Preheat oven to 320 degrees.
Line 2 baking sheets with parchment paper.
Process hazelnut flour, confectioners sugar, cocoa powder, and cayenne together in a food processor until all lumps are gone.
Place in a bowl and fold in the first measure of egg whites until the mixture is mostly combined; it will look crumbly and dry.
Make the second mixture.
Place the egg whites in the bowl of a stand mixer with the cream of tartar.
Place the sugar and water in a small saucepan.
Heat the sugar and water over medium heat while the egg whites are whipping.
When the sugar syrup reaches 320 degrees F, the egg whites should be at soft peaks.
Heat the syrup until it reaches 340 degrees F.
With the mixer running, slowly pour the syrup over the meringue.
Allow to whip until the meringue has cooled and is stiff.
Fold the first and second mixtures together until the batter is like lava.
Pipe out circles and leave to dry for 15 minutes.
Bake for 12 minutes, or until cookies lift cleanly off the parchment.

Miniature Cheesecake
adapted from Miette

ingredients:
1/2 pound (8 ounces) cream cheese, softened
1/4 cup sugar
1 egg
2 tablespoons half and half
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F and put a large kettle on to boil.
Wrap a 6-inch springform pan tightly in aluminum foil and lightly grease the inside; place inside a roasting pan.
Beat cream cheese until soft and fluffy; stream in sugar and beat until well incorporated.
Scrape the sides of the bowl and beat in the egg, half and half, and vanilla.
Pour into prepared pan.
Carefully pour boiling water around the springform into the roasting pan.
Bake for 1 hour and 20 minutes, until set and the center jiggles only slightly.
Allow to cool completely, then freeze prior to placing in the cake.

Strawberry Cayenne Jam
ingredients:
1 quart strawberries
1/4 cup sugar
1 teaspoon pectin (low or no sugar)
Few pinches cayenne pepper
directions:
Chop strawberries finely and place in a wide saucepan with the sugar, pectin, and cayenne.
Cook until thickened and jammy, about 10 minutes.
Purée if desired.


6-inch Chocolate cake
adapted from the back of a Hershey’s cocoa powder
ingredients:
1 cup sugar
3/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons flour
1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons cocoa powder
3/4 teaspoon baking powder
3/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 egg
1/2 cup milk
1/4 cup oil
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 cup hot coffee
directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
Grease 2 6-inch pans.
Whisk dry ingredients together.
Whisk wet ingredients (except coffee) together, then whisk into the dry ingredients.
Whisk in the hot coffee and pour into prepared pans.
Bake for 25 minutes, until a toothpick comes out clean.

Italian Meringue Buttercream
Same as here. 1/2 the recipe.

To assemble:
Place one cake on a cake plate.  
Spread with 3 tablespoons jam, then top with the frozen cheesecake.
Spread 3 tablespoons jam on the underside of the second cake, then place it jam side down onto the cheesecake.
Crumb coat with the buttercream.
Pipe 6 swirls on top of the cake, nestle in macarons that have been sandwiched with a little jam (3/4 teaspoon-1 teaspoon per cookie) or extra buttercream.
Serve at room temperature.

by Rachel Sally

More, More, More

All the s’mores!
I am so greedy.
Today, I said goodbye “see you later” to one of my best friends, S.
Yes, the S for whose birthday I made a s’mores cake.
What are the chances that this post would be about s’mores?
I didn’t engineer it this way, it just happened to be so.
It was meant to be.
I’m greedy because now is not enough.
The years I have spent with my friends, growing and fighting and partying and loving, are not enough.
I want more.  I want more time.
More chances to show them how much I love them,
how much I appreciate them and all they do and all their quirks.
I want more, more, more.
I want to drink up all of their love, all of my love, all of the times we have spent together, to soak in it and revel in it and I’m worried I haven’t done enough of that.
It is so bittersweet, this time in our lives.
We are both leaving and being left.
We are starting a new part of our lives.  It’s terrifying.
I’m not ready.
I don’t want to be ready.
I’m scared.
I took these s’mores to a farewell BBQ with just a few of my closest friends.
The marshmallows were soggy because it rained all day.  I was pissed.
But whatever, that’s not what matters.
I love these people.  That’s something I’ll never lose, and something I’ll never get enough of.
I don’t have many words today, so I will share pictures.
 
Marshmallows here.
Graham crackers here.
Love below.
by Rachel Sally

Make It Work

Watch out, because whether you like it or not, I’m sharing some shi stuff that I’m loving right now.
This post is peppered with links.  Click ’em!
Meow.
Reading Blood and Beauty, a fabulously intricate novel about the Borgia family in 15th century Italy, by Sarah Dunant.
This book is right up my alley. I love historical-fiction novels about European monarchies. (Speaking of which, I’ve just binge-watched the first season of the Tudors.)
Also reading Dash and Bella, a new-to-me blog that makes me laugh and cry and cry and laugh.
Seriously, I read every single post in the span of two days.
I cried three times and laughed the whole way through.
Phyllis is an amazingly personable writer who has a way of transporting her reader into her kitchen.
In other words, she is not a terrible writer.
Watching Pirate Radio, a movie set in 1960s Britain on none other than a pirate radio ship.
I’m actually writing this right after having finished this movie, so it’s still fresh in my mind.
My final thoughts- they did an awesome job with the music and the actors captured the very British and very raucous, racy mood perfectly.
Also watching the new season of Project Runway… Gosh how I love Tim Gunn.
I’ve been watching Project Runway with my dad since the second season.
It’s one of our shows, among the ranks of GoT, Mad Men, Breaking Bad, Top Chef, Veep, etc.
Carry on!
Listening to lots of the Rolling Stones- I love rock n roll in the summer time. It makes me feel extra free and fun.
Also listening– this song by Ellie Goulding. Love!
Making these tarts, for a little dinner party, filling them with luscious lime curd and deep dark chocolate ganache.
Also making ice creams and summer succotashes served with hot sauce and scrambled eggs, dreaming of making malasadas and hand pies and ice cream cakes. (I’ll back quite soon with some of these delights!)
Raspberry Tartlettes
makes 5 or 6 small tartlettes or 1 9-inch tart
for the pâte sucrée shells:
ingredients:
12 tablespoons butter, cut into pieces
1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons sugar
1 teaspoon kosher salt
1 1/2 cups flour
2 medium egg yolks, or one large/extra-large
directions:
Cream the butter, salt, and sugar together on high for 5 minutes, until very fluffy and extremely pale.
Scrape the sides of the bowl and add the flour, mixing only until the mixture is starting to form large curds.
Add the egg yolks with the mixer running and mix until a cohesive dough comes together.
Press into tartlette molds or a 9 inch tart pan.
Prick all over with a fork, then freeze for at least 15 minutes.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
Bake the shells until they are golden and slightly tanned, 15-18 minutes.
Remove from the oven and allow to cool completely.
for the lime curd:
ingredients:
3/4 cup lime juice
scant 1 cup sugar
zest of 2 limes
pinch kosher salt
5 medium egg yolks, or 4 large/extra-large
8 tablespoons butter, cold and cubed
directions:
In a heavy bottomed sauce pan, rub the lime zest and sugar together until fragrant.
Add in the egg yolks, lime juice, and salt and whisk to combine.
Heat over medium-low heat until the mixture comes to a boil and thickens, about 10 minutes.
The mixture should be thick enough to leave a trail when a spatula is dragged through.
Either transfer mixture to a blender or blend with an immersion blender.
Add in the butter chunks one at a time, blending to emulsify. (If you use a real blender, you can throw half of all the chunks in and just do it in two additions.)
Allow the curd to cool completely before using.
for the salted dark chocolate ganache:
ingredients:
3/4 cup dark chocolate, either chips or chunks, at least 70% cocoa
3 tablespoons heavy cream, or as needed
pinch sea salt
directions:
In a microwave or over a double boiler, melt the chocolate until it is 2/3 of the way melted. (In a microwave, nuke it in 25 second blasts, stirring between each.  You will probably need 3 blasts, but it depends on the wattage of your microwave.)
Stir in the heavy cream and sea salt and heat just a little more, to melt it 3/4 of the way.
(In a microwave, this will probably be a 15 second burst.)
Finally, stir the mixture very well until it becomes shiny and glossy.
Allow to cool to body temperature before using.
to assemble:
Fill each of the tartelette shells with a scant 1/2 cup of either mixture.
Smooth out with a small offset spatula or a butter knife.
Decorate with raspberries (you’ll need about 2 pints) and dust with powdered sugar.
by Rachel Sally

Kawaii!

^.^
Hai!

I’m home home home after driving 12 hours in the past 32.
Needless to say, after shoveling leftover, cold Indian food into my mouth late last night just after arriving home, I fell right asleep, snuggled deep into my comfortable bed.

I woke up this morning and peered in my fridge- surprise!
My mama had made lots of yummy jams from all the fruit we had picked on Saturday.
Raspberry raspberry raspberry sour cherry and a vat of peach and lemon thyme on the stove, simmering away.
Swirled into some yogurt- a lovely way to wake up and greet the day.
Now, I’ve spent the last two hours taking an alcohol education program (online) that’s required for my school and taking instagram videos of my kitten.
(I’ve never done an instagram video before… though since its installation, my Vine has fallen to the wayside.)
Not the loveliest way to greet the day, but whatever.
 
I’ve been meaning to write this blog post for a while.
I can’t find very inspired words.
I don’t know if an in-depth post is really necessary with this cake- I mean, what can I say, I look at it and can’t help but smile… It’s just so goshdarn cute.
This is the first trial of what will probably-maybe-definitely become an obsession.  
I think deco roll cakes are just so, well, kawaii. 
They’re Japanese-born, mainly thanks to Junko, who has written a few books about them and whose roll cakes are incredible.
 
Unfortunately, I don’t speak Japanese, so I used someone else’s adaptation of the Google translated recipe on Junko’s blog and I used a joconde imprime decor paste (used for joconde, or almond flour, sponge cakes).  
It didn’t come out quite how I wanted, as the imprime decor paste didn’t meld well with the actual sponge batter.
I’m going to hunt for some more deco sponge cake recipes/techniques to try, so that the decorations will be more united with the cake.
 
I made other adaptations that I liked- I added a vanilla bean Italian meringue on the interior instead of the traditional whipped cream, because I just love that marshmallow-y fluff, and it added sweetness without being overpowering.
Some notes: if you aren’t familiar with sponge cakes, don’t do the decorations.
Instead, focus on learning how to make the (two) batters and roll the cake without cracking it.
The trick is to use a couple liberally sugared towels to roll the cake up before filling it.
Also, wait till it’s cool!
 
Deco-Roll– Trial 1
 
for the joconde decor paste:
adapted from Bake In Paris
ingredients:
100 grams unsalted butter
100 grams confectioner’s sugar
100 grams egg whites
14 grams cornstarch
96 grams AP flour
food coloring 
directions:
Cream the butter and sugar together for at least 3 minutes, until fluffy, shiny, and pale.
Add in the egg whites; mixture will appear to curdle.
Mix as well as you can to get the mixture as homogeneous as possible; it won’t be completely mixed.
Scrape down the sides of the bowl.
Stir the cornstarch and flour together and add into the mixture. 
Beat on high until just combined.
Divide the mixture into 4 100-gram measures and tint as desired.
Pipe your designs onto a greased, parchment paper lined 15×10 sheet pan (jelly roll pan) as desired; I piped small polka dots.
Freeze for at least 15 minutes, or until designs are completely hard.
Meanwhile, prepare sponge batter.
 
for the sponge batter:
ingredients:
part A: egg yolk batter
3 egg yolks
30 grams sugar
60 grams milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
40 grams canola or vegetable oil
10 grams cornstarch
70 grams AP flour
part B: meringue
3 egg whites
30 grams sugar
big pinch cream of tartar
directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
Combine the egg yolks and sugar in a bowl (not your stand mixer bowl, if you have one!  Use a whisk or electric mixer for the yolks and a stand mixer for the meringue).
Place the whites (for the meringue) with the sugar and cream of tartar in the bowl of your stand mixer (if you do not have a stand mixer, simply prepare the yolk batter first, then use your whisk or mixer to prepare the meringue second.  If you happen to have both an electric and stand mixer, you can prepare both components of the batter at the same time.) and begin to beat on medium speed (about a 4 on a KitchenAid.)
Beat the yolks on high or whisk briskly for 3 minutes, until doubled or tripled in size and very pale.
Add in the milk, oil, and vanilla and beat just to combine.
Check on your egg whites; once they reach stiff peaks, turn the mixer off.
Sift the cornstarch and flour over the egg yolk mixture and fold to mix.
Now, bring the two batters together.
Take 1/3 of your meringue and gently mix it into the egg yolk batter with a spatula.
Once combined, fold the rest of the meringue into the batter gently.
Once it is all mixed, remove your sheet pan from the freezer and gently spread the batter over the piped design.
Bake for 12 minutes.
While the sponge is baking, prepare yourself to flip it and roll it.
 
for flipping and rolling:
you will need:
a larger sheet pan, or a cutting board
2 dish towels that are larger than your cake
plenty of powdered sugar
a wire cooling rack
directions:
Lay out one of the towels on top of the sheet pan or cutting board and sift powdered sugar all over it, very liberally.
Lay out your other towel on a countertop and sift powdered sugar over it, very liberally.
Once your cake comes out of the oven, you will flip it onto the sheet pan or cutting board that has been lined with the towel.  
You will then peel the parchment paper off of the cake; you will see the baked-in designs- this will be the outside of the roll.
You will then take the sheet pan/cutting board and flip the cake over onto the other prepared towel that has been covered in powdered sugar.
You will then carefully roll the cake up in the towel, secure it by twisting the ends slightly, and place it on the wire cooling rack to cool completely.
It is best to run over the steps in your mind before doing them so that you do not panic when the sheet cake is warm, because time is of the essence when rolling.
Rolling a warm cake will prevent cracks, but stay cool and composed.
Once the cake is cooled, you will unroll and release it from the towel and fill it with meringue.
 
for the vanilla bean Italian meringue:
ingredients:
75 grams egg whites (about 2)
pinch cream of tartar
150 grams sugar
50 grams water
scrapings of 1/2 a vanilla bean
directions:
Place the egg whites and cream of tartar in the clean bowl of your stand mixer and turn it on to a speed around 3-5 on a KitchenAid.
Meanwhile, place the sugar and water in a heavy bottomed pan fitted with a thermometer.
Heat the sugar syrup until it reaches 245 degrees F, at which point the whites should have reached stiff peaks.
Slowly pour the syrup into the whites with the mixer running; allow to whip until the meringue reaches body temperature.
Sometime while the mixer is still running, add in the vanilla seeds.
Once the meringue is cooled, spread a thick layer over the interior of the cake roll.
Roll up the cake and pipe some decorative meringue on top.
Enjoy!
 
by Rachel Sally

Food For Thought

The other day, someone politely informed me that I was a terrible writer, with a sneer and a laugh.
Um… Thanks?

I had no response.

I spluttered and mumbled.   
“Oh.”

I was saddened by the fact that I felt so bothered and upset by such breezy criticism.
I was sad that I was sad.
A cheery circle of life, no?

Anyways, this prompted me to sit down at my computer, poised and ready to write a beautiful post, one that would surely impress this person, should they ever bother to read my blog again.

I’ve been sitting here ever since.
Sort of. 
I have been dwelling on this, more than I really should be.
This post has lain blank, while my mind churns with all the things I want to shout say.

What better place to rant than here on my very own blog, on the ever-so-private internet?
Actually, I don’t want this to be private.  
I want it to be shared and sent around, all around, despite its intimate and private contents- I want it to make its rounds through people’s inboxes and readers.
This is because I want it to have some impact.
I want people to remember how others feel when they make them feel bad about themselves, because sometimes we just don’t think before we speak.
We all forget too soon how we have felt when we are sad and broken.

We’ve all been on both ends of a less-than-kind comment, and I won’t hear otherwise.

I mean, honestly, as if I needed yet another thing to pick at inside me.
Another sore place where I feel I’m not good enough- another place which I scratch until it bleeds, until I drown in all of that bloody sorrow and regret and self-loathing.
 
I struggle to grasp at confidence; I do my best to act it, even when I don’t feel at all confident within.
There are a few things that I am (was?) confident about, and one is my baking and my blog.
I toil here, probably more than you think, to create a product of which I can be proud.
 
I love my blog.  And I love my readers.
And frankly, I put enough work in here that I don’t really care if someone thinks I’m a terrible writer.  
 
But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt when they tell me that.
To be honest, I’m not confident enough that it doesn’t make me doubt myself and my intentions.
I still came back to this blog with the thought that perhaps it’s not worth it, or not good enough, that people don’t like to read it.
I worried about this blog, and I worried about myself.  
For days.
 
So couldn’t that snide comment have been left to the wayside?

Because where exactly did it leave me?
Extra critical and picky over this blog.
Worried and worrying about what others think of me, not only myself, now, but also my blog.
Worried not only about how other bloggers receive me, but also my readers.
Self-doubting.
 
If we spent half as much time loving and appreciating as doubting and critiquing ourselves, don’t you think we- and this world as a whole- would be that much more satisfied and happy?

Wouldn’t we be that much more willing to love others?  To overlook their faults and embrace them?  
Don’t the majority of our criticisms and anger stem from our own sadness?

I lay in bed last night, feeling the cool air from my open window wash over me, wrapping around my ankles and resting in the crook of my elbows, flooding my nose and cooling the back of my throat, thinking about self-appreciation and love.

My thoughts- harboring hate self propagates; sow seeds of love and harvest happiness. 

The happier we are with ourselves- the more comfortable in our own skins- the brighter and happier our futures will be.

I want my future to glow- to shine- bright enough to blind.
That starts with loving myself.
That starts (anew) here.

Phew.  
To conclude this, I’m giving you the recipe for a cake that loves you back.
It’s raw, vegan, sugar-free, gluten-free, and much lower in fat than most other raw desserts.
I’ve swapped in low-fat coconut milk and coconut, reduced the amount of nuts used in the crust and filling, and added a vegetable.
Zucchini!  That magical veggie which we are all guaranteed to have too much of in the coming weeks, as the plants churn out hundreds of little green squashes.
 
This cake boasts healthy fats from coconut, avocado, and walnuts.
It gets all of its sweetness from bananas, mangoes, dates, and a touch of stevia.
It’s pretty, and it’s yummy.
It’s a hug for your stomach, which is pretty much as close as I can get to giving any of you a hug.

A Cake That Loves You Back
ingredients:
for the crust:
1/2 cup walnuts
1 cup coconut (I used reduced fat)
6 fat and juicy dried medjool dates, pitted
2 tablespoons coconut oil
for the banana layer:
2 bananas, peeled and chopped, then frozen
1 avocado
1 medium zucchini, peeled
1 scant cup of cashews, picked over and soaked in cold water for at least 2 hours
juice of 1 1/2 lemons
1 teaspoon stevia extract
for the mango layer:
2 cups chopped, frozen mango
1 cup light coconut milk
directions:
Make the crust: pulse all of the crust ingredients together in a food processor until they form a uniformly coarse meal. 
Press into the bottom of a 9-inch springform pan.
Make the banana layer: in a blender or food pro, puree the cashews until very smooth.
Add in the rest of the ingredients and puree until very, very smooth, at least a couple minutes.
Spread over the crust and chill in the freezer until set.
Meanwhile, make the mango layer: in a blender or food pro, puree the mango and coconut milk until a thick, sorbet-like mixture is formed.
Spread over the frozen banana layer, then chill again until the whole thing is set.
Before serving, allow it to sit at room temperature to temper, then cut and serve.
by Rachel Sally

Pitter Pater

Happy Father’s Day!
Especially to my wonderful father, who is currently in London. 
(I know.  He missed out on father’s day.  I shouldn’t be baking him anything!!)
Shout out to you, Pops!
Father’s day seems to be about doing classic flavors in a new way… 
Last year was an Elvis cake, based on the famous friend banana and peanut butter sandwiches that the King loved.
This year, I made knockoff Little Debbie Oatmeal Cream Pies.  You know, the ones you remember from your childhood.  Soft, squidgy, filled with marshmallow and only slightly spicy.
My dad loves soft, chewy oatmeal cookies, and I know he likes OCPs.
When I found Stella of BraveTart’s recipe, I knew I had to make them.
The cookies aren’t exactly intuitive in the making, but once you bite into one, you know exactly what they’re supposed to be.  They taste amazingly similar to the store-bought, factory-processed cookies, but fresher and better, and slightly more complex as well.
I had to ship these internationally to my dad, and I’m just hoping that they get to him on time, before he leaves to come back to America.
If they don’t, it’s his loss, right?  That’s what you get for ditching your kid on Father’s Day.
Just kidding.  I love you, Daddy, and miss you even more.  
I hope you like the cookies.
Head here for the full Oatmeal Creme Pie recipe: these are dead ringers for the real deal OCPs.
The ingredients list is a little strange and involved, but it’s totally worth it.
Also, be sure to take your cookies out after exactly 8 minutes: they should be completely puffy and really soft- practically not baked at all, just warmed.  Once you take them out of the oven, they will fall and become very chewy and soft, just the way they should be.